"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. " 2 Corinthians 4:16-17
I think it was within the first or second week of treatment for my eating disorder that I was introduced to the idea of thinking errors. The first week I was pretty much arguing with my therapist that I really didn’t have a problem. I wasn’t that thin. I was actually in fact fat and could lose some weight, and if I start to eat more I will for sure become so obese and disgusting my life would be ruined. I will never forget how when she told me I was in fact too thin and what I was eating was indeed an anorexic intake, I stared at her like she was saying the grass was blue and the sky was green.
I truly could not comprehend that what I was seeing and thinking was not truth, fact, real or right. I couldn’t! I would waste $250.00, 50 minute sessions in tears trying to convince her that I was eating enough and how eating more or eating bread was the worst thing for me. When I think back to that time three years ago I can’t believe I was in such a dire mental state. I had zer...
I’ve been promising to blog about this topic for a while now and I’m finally doing it! I think I’ve pushed it off for many reasons. But mainly, I’m not a therapist, recovery specialist, dietician or a doctor, so I feel a little under-qualified to be discussing this topic. I AM however, a woman who was anorexic for seven years, excessively exercised and was one run away from death before I entered treatment three years ago. So while I am not a professional of any kind when it comes to eating disorders, I can give you my perspective on what you should do if someone you love is anorexic.
I won’t be discussing other eating disorders, as I don’t have any personal experience with them. However, there are so many similarities on a deeper level when it comes to different eating disorders that you can probably apply these ideas to those relationships as well :)
The first thing that I want to start off by saying is....anorexia is VERY dangerous. Eating disorders have the highest morta...
When you walk into a doctors office the last thing you want to feel is invalidated and dismissed. You want to be taken seriously, listened to, empathized with, treated with respect and given the high level of care you are paying for. Unfortunately this doesn’t always happen.
I personally have noticed that as my weight has increased, it is almost shocking how I have been treated when I see a new doctor. I’ve read about doctor bias when it comes to weight. I’ve heard the horror stories of people being misdiagnosed because a doctor can’t look past there BMI, but I never thought it would happen to me. I have a reason my weight is where it is at, all I need to do is explain my recovery, and they will understand and help me. Right?
Over a week ago I had an appointment at the Cleveland Clinic with one of the best endocrinologists they have. (I’m going to keep it cute and not share this doctors name…) I went to this doctor for all the reasons I’ve been blogging about over the past three years an...
Welp, I had a different blog in mind for this week, but I've had a lot happen, so I thought I would share about it. It's been a while since I wrote a blog about my actual recovery and how it's going, and well.....it's going. (blah).
It's such a rollercoaster. About a month ago I received some lab results back and honestly, they were the best lab results I've had since I started treatment. (AMEN!) My malnutrition is on it's way out, my inflammation markers have gone way down (even though they are still pretty bad), my insulin levels are almost back to normal, my blood sugar is basically perfect and most of my other tests (I think there were like 40) are finally coming back a smidge away from where we want them to be! There are only a few that just can't seem to get it together.
I was excited! It seemed like, at least on paper, my body is doing a lot better. I mean, for gosh sakes it's only taken three full years, thousands of pills (no exaggeration), tons of appointments, days of rest,...
Can you point out what’s different between the first photo and the other photos?
Answer: ummmmm pretty much everything other then they both are checkout lanes with a person scanning your food and you pay!
Let me tell you a story and what I noticed.
About a month ago my mom and I went to the Amish Home & Garden show. While we were driving home we stumbled upon the Amish Ashery bulk store that had a sign saying lacy swiss cheese, $3.84 a pound. We decided we MUST stop in and get some cheese and meat and whatever else tickled our fancy. ( I mean, I pay like $7.99 a pound for this stuff usually so this is a no brainer..) It did not disappoint. We picked up not only cheese, but lunch meat, maple syrup, maple peppered bacon, and all the yummy things.
When we went to check out I noticed something. There were no magazines anywhere. There was a shelf that had some candies on it and some mini pies. THAT’S IT!
As I walked away from the Ashery I realized a few things.
I want to take this blog post as an opportunity to talk a little bit about my thoughts and feelings on my husbands Q&A blogs the past two weeks! First of all, I want to thank my husband, Wyatt, for taking the time to answer all those questions and for being as honest as he was! My husband travels a lot for work and I know he sat up late in hotel rooms thinking through and answering all those questions. So I'm really grateful for that! I also know that as cliche as it sounds, he is a guy and he doesn't always love to re-hash the past, or deal with emotions let alone talk about them, so I'm actually really proud of him for sharing how he feels about my time as an anorexic as well as my recovery. Also, I'm the one with the blog and desire to share my recovery with the world, not him. So for him to open up to people he hasn't met with some really personal things I think was pretty dang brave and I hope it helps anyone who reads it!
I know from talking to some of you that you wonder wha...